whore moan

I keep wanting to break down
I'm hoping it's just the hormones from the period i'm supposed to be having right now - but for some reason am not.

I'm so stressed. Between hoping to God i can get into the nursing program, trying my hardest to get a B in Chem and managing my urge to get the hell out of here, I'm going crazy.

I am having a really hard time with all of this.

Block Party is this sat. it should be fun.
I don't really understand what all the hype is about. I suppose being allowed to drink outside is a big deal...?
I still have to buy a stupid wrist band so the cops don't give me an underage. I don't even plan on drinking very much anyway.
I have so much work to do and the MS walk on Sunday at 12. I can't afford to be hung over.

Note to self: Call PetCo and Giant about summer work... I keep procrastinating on it and if i don't jump someone is going to beat me to it. lkdsjfasldkjf

music

natasha beddingfield
lupe fiasco
---------------------------------------
i wish people would stop leaving the bathroom door propped open. it's getting annoying. i don't know why anyone would even want it open, it's a public bathroom.
most likely product of the idiot women on my floor.
---------------------------------------
i've fallen

save tonight

stressed! so stressed!
i really hope i don't have to drop out of school!
i really wish i was more conscious!

2 completely unrelated concerns

music

rihanna
maroon 5
98 degrees

regrets

- dating danny lindsey
- my previous desperation
- paying my $200 deposit for a dorm next year
- not sticking with nursing as my major
- every time i yelled at my mother
- being a terrible role model
- screwing over my job at JoAnn Fabrics
- eating so much candy

Baby Baby Baby

when all your love is gone who will save me from all I'm up against out in this world?
----------------------------------------------------
i'm really irritated with the world and the way things work.Marx may have actually had a point.
----------------------------------------------------
i'm coming down from a really unnatural sugar high
----------------------------------------------------
i don't think my CA likes me very much. then again, that's really not my problem. at least i still have my microwave.
----------------------------------------------------
maybe maybe maybe you'll find something that's enough to keep you.

other

Cotton candy is my favorite jelly bean
----------------------------------------------------
Things Anthony won't want to do:
SnowboardingCampingRent a boat
----------------------------------------------------
I am procrastinating so badly tonight
----------------------------------------------------
College pizza sauce is very gross
----------------------------------------------------
I wish I could have stayed at anth's house a bit longer
----------------------------------------------------
Block party is this weekend.I'm not nearly as excited as I should be.
----------------------------------------------------
I'm terrified of the future.

Thoughts

I need:
Brittany Spears
From First to Last
Mat Kearney (again)
--------------------------------------------------------------
Things Anthony won't want to do:
Zoo
Baltimore
Picnic
--------------------------------------------------------------
Possbile Careers:
Nurse
Occupational Therapist
Physician Assistant
--------------------------------------------------------------
Ways to make money while at school:
-
Work at women's shelter
Work at health center
-
--------------------------------------------------------------
Places I've applied to in York:
YWCA summer camp
PetCo
Giant
Wisehaven
Heritage Hills
--------------------------------------------------------------
What I would do if I had to drop out of college:
Work in York for a bit until my dad gets a new job.
--------------------------------------------------------------
What I would do if he didn't get a job within a year:
Talk to hospitals and see if I can get sponsorship to go to school to be an RN.
--------------------------------------------------------------
If that doesn't work:
Move and work until I am able to go back to school.
Absolutely will not live at home for more than a year...
--------------------------------------------------------------
Things I don't want to do:
Smoke cigarettes
Gain weight
Work in the food industry
--------------------------------------------------------------
Things I would love to do:
Go to Colorado
Go to the beach
Be a rock star
Be an actress
Be a makeup artist
Be the owner of an Art Gallery
Work at the cookie place in the mall